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The Threat of Islamist Plumbing: Handheld Bidets Coming to a Public Toilet Near You!

Islamist plumbing

By Emperor

The Islamic transformation of America is near complete: all that is left is for the handheld bidets to be installed. That’s according to one of Fox News’ best anti-Islamist defender’s of Judeo-Christian civilization reporters, Todd Starnes.

A story about a Wichita, Kansas university chapel that removed its pews, (a move interpreted by one Christian student as a sinister Muslim plot conceived and led by a bunch of dhimmi Christians no less), led Starnes to pen the greatest article ever to save Judeo-Christian Western civilization AND at the same time save Americans the time and effort of cleaning their ass.

Starnes, expertly placed the Christian led move to remove the chapel’s pews in the broader context of that most pressing issue: the politically correct marginalization of Christianity and the march to inevitable and complete Islamization.

Starnes, writes warning us all of the impending future,

Muslims students have presented a petition calling for the university to install Islamic-friendly plumbing. They want handheld bidets installed in restrooms around campus.

This is what the Islamic transformation of a nation founded on Judeo-Christian values looks like, folks. The Christian faith is marginalized while the Islamic faith is given accommodation.

An abomination. Are Americans now going to be required to clean their butts? Sorry to be so crass here but what happened to the Constitutional right to walk around with dingleberries in your draws?

This is a rallying cry, we must take action against bidets and other forms of Islamist plumbing! Call your senator or local rep., start a petition! Also, don’t forget to thank that modern-day Charlemagne, Todd Starnes, who by the way also wants you to know that he wrote a book,

I documented this phenomenon in my latest book, “God Less America.” Check out the chapter titled, “One Nation Under Allah.”

These are critical times, even some of Fox News’ readers have had the wool pulled over their eyes. Commenter, Rufus Callahan even had the gall to claim, “i mean…handheld bidets would be nice…”


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  • AJ

    Perhaps they hadn’t used it for ‘that’ purpose or perhaps they rinsed it clean.

  • George Carty

    Well, niqabis often jokingly get called “ninjas” 🙂

  • Bill

    “Allantide/Samhain/Halloween were celebrated at this time exactly because it was the last harvest, a time when winter-keeping vegetables were gathered, wine was put down, and surplus animals could be slaughtered and salted for winter use without fear of spoiling or flystrike.”

    Again, kind of my point.

  • Reynardine

    Also, not the same robin. The American robin is related closely to the mistle thrush.

  • Reynardine

    They used rutabagas for jack o’lanterns. Apple-bobbing derives from a Cornish Allantide custom, where an apple on a string was suspended from a crosspiece that held candles. If a boy and a girl could eat their way to the core before the hot wax drove them off, they kissed.

    Allantide/Samhain/Halloween were celebrated at this time exactly because it was the last harvest, a time when winter-keeping vegetables were gathered, wine was put down, and surplus animals could be slaughtered and salted for winter use without fear of spoiling or flystrike. Also, it was when (in northerly climates) the last deciduous greenery disappeared. The success or failure of these endeavors determined if the community would eat or starve. It merited a celebration.

    Most of the United States lies well south of most of Europe. Though the date wavered before it was fixed by statute, our Thanksgiving has been celebrated some time in November.

  • AJ

    I gather you keep an eye on the radicals…..

  • 1DrM

    Unless you can back up your statement…you’ve got nothing but an extremely ignorant opinion no one takes seriously. Going back to my original post, Judaism considers Christianity a pagan heresy with plenty of abuse towards Isa(a.s.) and his mother. Christianity rejects Judaism and blamed the Jews for “killing God”,and carried out centuries of persecution. Pick up a copies of the the OT, Talmud and New Testament to see the differences. Theologically and historically, there is no such thing as the “Judeo-Christian” tradition. The idea of a common “Judeo-Christian” tradition first surfaced at the end of the 19th century but did not gain popular support until the 1940s, as part of an American reaction to Nazism and subsequent support for the terrorist ideology of Zionism. It’s a secular myth favored by people who are not really believers themselves.
    Racial abuse? Rubbish. Prove it.

  • Jekyll

    they look like feminist llamas

  • Bill

    That’s kind of my point.

    If these things were all rooted in ancient solstice celebrations then a robin would mean what a robin means, whether present-day inheritors of those traditions have crossed the Atlantic or not.

    In reality, the robin is a symbol of winter if and only if you look out of your back window in winter and see only a solitary robin sitting on a snow-laden branch looking all Christmassy. If you live in a part of the world where they’re more evident in the springtime, then they’ll be considered to be springtime birds. The same goes for holly and chestnuts, say I.

    The shops are full of pumpkins because it’s the ancient Celtic season of Samhain? No, it’s because this is the time of year they’re ready to eat. We can be sure of this, because the ancient Celts had never seen a pumpkin – they’re a fairly recent introduction from North America.

  • Reynardine

    Or two.

  • Reynardine

    Not certain. Bear in mind that in the U.S., robins are something quite different, and are symbols of springtime

  • Reynardine

    There is a chronic urban legend about the coroner who finds a cadaver in the embraces of a vacuum cleaner, which is still going. Damn, that guy must have wanted to be really clean.

  • Bill

    Probably not my place to be giving Jesus advice, but I’d have kicked my legs free first.

    He’s about to fall forwards onto His nose.

  • Bill

    “Can’t tell Zionism and Judaism apart still?”

    Me, you’re asking?

    Because I don’t agree with the contention that “Judaeo-Christian…is a political term invented less then a century ago symbolizing the Christian subservience to Zionist messianic terrorism”?

    I told you why I disagree, and you quickly resorted to racial abuse. You’ve got nothing.

  • Bill

    I can get The Golden Bough from where I left it on my bookshelves. It’s outdated and discredited but, as I said before, it was a major work of scholarship in its day and quite interesting in its own right.

    It says nothing about Jack Frost or yule logs. I haven’t checked, but it won’t say much about robins either, I’ll warrant. They appear on Christmas cards because they are one of the few birds you notice in a European garden in wintertime, whether the household is pre-Christian, Christian or post-Christian and – I contend – the same goes for an awful lot of phenomena that people want to call “folklore”, such as evergreen table decorations and hearty fires. And chestnuts, roasting on an open fire.

    How did we get onto this anyway?

  • AJ


  • HSkol

    Well, eye certainly know you.

  • Reynardine

    Eye don’t know.

  • Reynardine

    Most people don’t. That disgusting dreck all over the floor is their trampled and befouled remains, amalgamated with soggy toilet paper.

  • Reynardine

    I have no knowledge of whether they are, or how many are.

  • HSkol
  • AJ

    Hey so atheists are washing bottoms too…. Yay!! something that unites us…

  • Reynardine

    You must be the cheetah.

  • Reynardine

    You can get a common aluminum quart pitcher in quite a few grocery stores. But keep TP for afterwards, because going around with wet pants…

  • AJ

    Ilisha, I found a further update. Please email me. The profane stalker creep reads this so I didn’t want to put it here.

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